Friday, June 3, 2011


well, the four or so days leading up to this cycle of menstruation were dark. my pms is getting ornery. i was feeling suicidal, in all actuality. i got drunk last night. coors, flattened, followed by a cheap vine. i bid my friends goodnight, kneeled in front of the porcelain vortex, took a photo of the bloodred vomit& spinned, as opposed to spun, in the bed. the first night of my period i didn't take a pain killer. i folded a towel under my rump & writhed, as opposed to wruth, a bit before it occurred to me to accept the pain & let it wash through me, so to speak. at which point it became in gaseous colors.

that big old clam shell from the hostel, i put my bloody underwear in it, crunched if it were paper, into a ball, along with the moonstone pendulum and the opal egg, and asked my pain to be: fill this instead.